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The Love Languages in Relationships

By on Feb 24, 2017 in Blog | 0 comments

In working with clients around relationship issues with their love one, I find that one of the most common problem is how each person is interpreting, or misinterpreting, love. When we misinterpret our partner’s language of love it is like mistranslating a phrase in another language and it can take on a whole different meaning. What do I mean by languages of love? Author Gary Chapman developed the five languages of love and has a book and website that discusses these languages much more in depth. However, for the sake of this blog post, I want to briefly introduce the concept and show how it can a big difference in communication with your loved one. The five languages of love are as follows: Words of Affirmation Acts of Service Receiving Gifts Quality Time Physical Touch If you take the test on the website, you can discover which language of love resonates most with you. It’s then important to find out which language resonates most with your partner. No one love language is better or worse than the other, they are just different. What I do notice, is that for each person their love language seems so clear as to be the way to give and receive love. Examples can sound something like: “If they loved me they would tell me more how much they love me” – Words of Affirmation “If they loved me they would help me out more” – Acts of Service “If they loved me they would surprise me more with little gifts” – Receiving Gifts “If they loved me they would want to spend more time with me” – Quality of Time “If they loved me they would be more affectionate with me” – Physical Touch When a couple has different love languages, and doesn’t know it, they can easily miss when the other person is actually communicating love.  Imagine a couple where one person’s love language is physical touch and the other person’s love language is acts of service.  Struggle in the relationship can sound something like this: (husband/wife) Wife: “It’s nice that my husband is affectionate. He holds my hand, gives lots of kisses, and is attentive which is nice. However, he never...

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Work Should Work For You

By on Feb 24, 2017 in Blog | 0 comments

I am continually amazed at how much productivity is lost in business due to dysfunctional work environments. I work with clients who are continuously exhausted, stressed, discouraged and resentful in their jobs. They are often dealing with aggressive communication from bosses and/or lack of appreciation for the hard work they are doing on behalf of the company. Over time they start to lose motivation and their productivity suffers despite the desire to be dedicated and hard working. Most of my clients would happily stay at their job but end up looking for a new job that can provide them a more functional and enjoyable work environment. Companies should understand how much money is lost every year due to employee turnover and having to continually train new employees. And yet, there doesn’t seem to be any incentive to change their behaviors. Of course, there are many companies that have functional work environments but I am concerned about my clients whose companies continue to treat their employees as expendable widgets. Clients often come to me in order to find strategies to manage their work environment or transition to a new job. One of the best ways to manage the stress of a less than functional work environment is to recognize what is in your control and what is not. It’s to set boundaries, have realistic expectations, and empower self to have a healthy work/life balance. Every client’s situation is a bit difference but I love helping my clients find strategies to be fulfilled in their work environment. Don’t settle for a lousy work place, empower yourself to get a healthy work...

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Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) for Anxiety

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) for Anxiety

By on May 22, 2014 in Slider | 0 comments

For many adults who suffer from anxiety and panic disorders, everyday life can be challenging and more difficult than most people realize. The anxiety can result in a dreadful fear of certain events, impending thoughts of a panic attack, and the persistent physical symptoms. This can be all the more difficult when you feel like no one else understands what is going on. Society often attaches certain stigmas for those who suffer from anxiety and minimize their experience. Below are some common things that people with anxiety often experience. “Calm Down” can be annoying and ineffective. Panic attacks are never convenient. Physical symptoms can show up in unexpected ways. Fear has a different meaning for different people. Being anxious is more than just being stressed out. Overthinking is exhausting (but you can’t help it). Your phobia is minimized or joked about. Stigma about treating anxiety with medication Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) can be helpful for those with anxiety to help them learn new skills and tools to manage their anxiety symptoms. [jwplayer...

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Building Better Relationships…

Building Better Relationships…

By on May 21, 2014 in Slider | 0 comments

I can help you to build effective communication skills and form healthy relationships A healthy relationship can improve many aspects of your life; it can strengthen your health, your mind, and your connections with others. However, if the relationship isn’t working, it can also be a tremendous drain. Relationships difficulties can be with your spouse, family, children, colleagues and friends. Below are some common strategies that can help you build and keep a healthy relationship, and repair trust and love that may have been lost. Relationships are an investment and the more you put in, the more you can get back. Staying involved with each other Getting through conflict Keeping outside relationships and interests alive Communicating with honest, direct and respectful...

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Life Keeps Moving…

Life Keeps Moving…

By on May 20, 2014 in Slider | 0 comments

Working with Individual, Couples and Families to help get through life’s transitions A major life transition can be many things from moving to a new city, leaving for college, experiencing a divorce, being a new parent, or the loss of a loved one. Almost anyone who’s gone through a big life change can relate to the feeling that your world has been turned upside down. Dealing with a major transition, even those that are welcomed, may not be easy; but there are ways to keep your sanity intact — and to turn the challenges into opportunities for growth. Here are some key ideas to help move past the fear and embrace the life transitions you may be facing Accept the change Find time for reflection Take it one day at a time Use support systems Allow time to grieve Focus on the positive [jwplayer...

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